Saying good-bye is hard

Saying Good-bye to someone is one of the hardest things a person goes through, if not THE hardest thing. Whether its saying good-bye to someone who has passed away, or whos moving away...or if your moving away and you have to say good-bye to everyone around you.

I have been working through 2 of those good-byes. My grandfather died...which has been really hard. He died on May 16. I was doing alright with it for a bit...after the funeral and everything...I was fine, I went to yc and danced and had fun and it was all fine...and then I had my grad...and I looked up to my family...and he wasn't there and it was so hard. He was always there for milestones in our lives...he was always there no matter what. And never complained about it. And I started recovering, again...or at least I thought I did. Then last week...we had a grief lesson at sunday school and that just brought out more emotions...and this last week...my emotions have been rolling. Because of that...and because Im leaving soon. Im so excited to go to Vancouver and Im going out of my mind here...because I know something bigger and better is coming up. And friday, we had a bonfire with some people from school...and saying good-bye to them was incredibly hard. And then today, they did kind of the "final good-bye" at church...and it wasn't too hard for me...but then I looked around and there were people crying...and then there was my mom who was like...weeping...haha.

I dont want to say good-bye...but Im so excited to leave. Everyones like "I dont want you to go" "i cant believe your leaving" and its like...i feel like I shouldn't be as happy or excited as I am. Everyone around me is so bumed that Im leaving and everytime I talk about it...I just want to jump in the air and dance...I know it sounds corney, haha...but its the truth. Im excited beyond belief.

Anyways...thats all Im gonna say for today

2 Corinthians 5:13

I was sitting at the computer listening to Leeland and all of the sudden these words came into my head. The inspiration behind them actually came from 2 Corinthians 5:13

- If we are out of our mind, it is for the sake of God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you

So I take this as...be insane for Jesus...dont hold back. Do whatever you can to please God! If God wants you to buy a homeless person lunch, do it. If God wants you to raise your hands in church, even if no one at church does it...do it anyways. Give God all the Glory, Honor, and Praise that he deserves...no matter where you are in your life!


Are you quiet? Are you shy?
Are you always passing by?
What the lord has said to you
What the lord has done too

Are you Happy? Are you stoked?
With what the lord has provoked?
What else has he said to you?
What else can he do?

Be insane in the name of Jesus
So he can see us
Go Crazy, make it big, and make it loud
So he can hear us

Grad '08!!!

So I graduated yesterday. So stoked for it!!! It all kinda went by in a blurr though.

AND!! I shaved my head today!!

PS! Jesus is truly amazing. People are hung over today and Im tired with a headache, lol...but Jesus honestly gave me the strength to not drink.

Im to tired to say much...so I'll leave you with pics and a video.

My prayer

I dont care whats happening in my life...I need Christ, and I need him to take me under his wing!



Can you hear me? Does anyone around me
Feel the way that I feel now?
Cause from the window where I sometimes cry
I just want to see Your face tonight
And I'm willing to lose everything I am

Cause I need you more than ever
I need Your help to find where I've been going wrong so far

Take me under Your wing tonight
Make me so perfect in Your eyes
Hold on cause it will be alright
You're not alone.

When You're near me, I feel like I just found me
In the traces of the boy from yesterday
But in a world that is so black and white
I will take the steps to change my life
And I won't be coming back to here again

I need Your loving hand to guide me
Through the maze of all the things inside me
Then I'll know that I'm alright

Cause I need You more than ever
I need Your help to find where I've been going wrong so far

Take me under Your wing tonight
Make me so perfect in Your eyes
Hold on cause it will be alright
You're not alone
Please help me get from worse to better
Before these tears soak through this lonely sweater
And let me know that I'm alright
I still have one strike of this match left
And I'm holding on to my last breath
And its getting a little dark around to see here

Take me under Your wing tonight
Make me so perfect in your eyes
Hold on cause it will be alright
You're not alone

Take me under Your wing tonight
Make me so perfect in your eyes
Hold on it will be alright
You're not alone

And You'll be here forever, forever You'll stay
And You promised to love me, You'll love me always
You'll love me for always, You'll love me for always
Always

So the video isn't actually a video....its just a picture, but its a good song to just listen to.

My king!

I may have posted this before, I probably have, but its so powerful.






And the "rock" version

YC 2008 - Passion

CARPE DIEM - SEIZE THE DAY

That is one thing we heard all weekend. And I swear, there must have been a TWC representative there cause they kept talking about being more than conquerors lol.

YC 2008 - Passion was this weekend. 17 000 young people worshiping God together. It was amazing. The power of the holy spirit was so consuming! All weekend there were tears, and there was laughter.

RIP Grandpa

I can be a nightmare of the grandest kind
I can withhold like it’s going out of style
I have the bravest heart that you've ever seen
and you've never met anyone
Who's as positive as I am sometimes.

You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can’t relate
And you’re still here

I blame everyone else, not my own partaking
My passive-aggressiveness can be devastating
I'm the most gorgeous woman that you've ever known
And you've never met anyone
Who is as everything as I am sometimes

You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can’t relate
And you’re still here

You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can’t relate
And you’re still here

What I resist, persists, and speaks louder than I know
What I resist, you love, no matter how low or high I go

I'm the funniest woman you've ever known.
I am the dullest woman you've ever known.
I'm the most gorgeous woman you've ever known
And you've never met anyone as, as everything as I am sometimes.

You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can’t relate
And you’re still here

And you’re still here
And you're still here...


Grandpa, You've seen every part of me, and you never left me. You're gone in spirit but I will always have you close to me.

I love you!

I dont care where you are

I'll always be there for you...wherever the lord may place you!!!

























listen baby ain´t no mountain high ,ain´t no valley low,
ain´t no river wide enough baby

If you need me call me
no matter where you are,
no matter how far (don't worry baby)
just call out my name.
I'll be there in a hurry
you don't need to worry

chorus:
'Cause baby there
Ain't no mountain high enough
Ain't no valley low enough
Ain't no river wide enough
To keep me from getting to you babe

Remember the day
I set you free
I told you you could always count on me,darling
From that day on
I made a vow
I'll be there when you want me
some way,somehow

Chorus

No wind,
No rain,

Or winter's cold.
Can stop me baby.
ooooh baby
Cause you are my goal
If you're ever in trouble
I'll be there on the double
just send for me
oooh baby
send for me oooh baby

My love is alive
Deep down in my heart
Although we are miles apart

If you ever need a helping hand
I'll be there on the double
just as fast as I can

You know that ;
they're ain't no mountain high enough,
ain't no valley low enough,
ain't no river wide enough,
to keep me from getting to you babe

Peaceful, calming, Crazy, Busy

So I was thinking about how crazy my life is right now....and how much crazier its gonna get in the next month. It makes me think of December, when I went to "The cabin" which was actually my brothers fiance's family's cabin. Im sitting here thinking about how relaxed I was....with the mountains and the creek and...the hot tub. I dont know, theres just something about being in the mountains that relaxes me. Which is probably good considering Im moving to Vancouver. I dont know, I just thinking about it. I miss being stress-free.

Thinking...(oh dear)

So Im sitting in my english class....not doing anything except facebooking...and blogging, obviously.

Right now...I feel disconnected from everything. I really feel like moving on. I want June 29th to get here so I can finally do that. Its a feeling that is very unsettling. I went and saw a movie based out of Chicago yesterday...and it made me think of how happy I was when I was in Chicago, and then when I was in BC afterwards. Maybe because I wasn't in school then, haha but I dont know.

And right now....the crossover of food (gluten food to gluten free food) has been making me sick...which is brutal...and apparently its gonna last like....2 months...so annoying.

Anyways...thats my life right now...well...part of it.

And again, the dog wouldnt eat it!

So...I found out on friday that I do in fact have celiac disease...so I've been trying out different gluten-free foods...most of them arent too bad, but I had a granola bar sunday morning that I think is only good for one thing...emptying your stomach....it was gross...my dog wouldnt eat it, and my dog eats everything. And then today, I had a instant meal...penne....and I took it out of the microwave and some spilled on the ground, the dog came over...licked some up...SPAT IT OUT! and walked out of the room! That shows how good it was... :S

By request

So....I have a request from Sarah to tell everyone how "well" I came out of the anasthetic from my biposy today...so here it goes..

I thought I was in my leadership class, so I tried sitting up and the nurse told me to lay back down....and I was like "SHUT UP ALLIE I DONT WANNA LAY DOWN!"

Then i asked how sundaes went (cause we had a sundae fundraiser at school at lunch that I was in charge of)...Obviously...the nurse didnt know and I got mad, lol.

Then they asked if I wanted ANOTHER popcycle....I do not remember eating a first popcycle...kinda scary.

So...apparently this will make you laugh

Galations 1:6-8

So...I've taken these 3 verses....and written my interpretation of the verse in my own words in bold...tell me what you think!!!

6I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting the one who called you by the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel

I’m shocked that you could turn your back on the Lord, and that you’re turning to a completely different belief system!

7which is really no gospel at all. Evidently some people are throwing you into confusion and are trying to pervert the gospel of Christ.

That new thing you believe in…it’s a load of crap! Obviously you’re being tricked and thrown into something that has somehow been twisted into sounding like the Lord, and you are being converted by a twisted gospel.

8But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach a gospel other than the one we preached to you, let him be eternally condemned!

Any Believer of the Lord who has preached something other than what his word says…he will have eternal Damnation.

Galations 1:3-5

3 Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ
4 who gave himself for our sins to rescue us from the present evil age, according to the will of our God and Father
5 to whom be glory for ever and ever.

Amen.

I started reading through Galations, but Im not going to read a chapter at a time like I usually do, I'm simply going to read a few verses at a time, so I can really meditate on what it says and take it for what each verse says, as opposed to what each chapter says, so I can really break it down and hear all the words of the LORD. I read Galations 1:3-5 yesterday, and it basically talks about how God had planned all along to have Jesus die for our sins, so that we wouldn't need to be enslaved to this sinful earth. But, yes he rescued us from the slavery of this sinful earth, however he didn't take us away from it. We're still here, we're not living in a bubble. We have to make an effort to keep ourselves from the captivity. God isn't going to keep us from sin, he gave us free will. Its up to us to make that effort...we have to be willing to ask God for help. God saved us but we have to want the saving.

SOMEONE STOLE MY IDEA

So a few years ago we came up with WWJD smackdown on the way to youth councils...and never got around to making it...haha. I was gonna do it at camp or something (I still might) but I was on the internet and found this...I laughed super hard!!

Im sorry

Im sorry this happened to you
Im sorry for your pain
Im sorry you have to be alone through this
Im sorry theres no one there
Im sorry I cant help

I wish I could be there
I wish i could show you that I care about you
I wish I could show you that not everyone in the world is like that
I wish This didnt happen to you
I wish I could take the pain away

I just want you to remember I love you, and Im always here for you.


Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Titus 1:15-16

15 To the pure, all things are pure, but to those who are corrupted and do not believe, nothing is pure. In fact, both their minds and consciences are corrupted.
16 They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. They are detestable, disobedient and unfit for doing anything good.

If you watch carefully, there are so many corrupted Christians, who say they're Christians, then go and get so drunk that they cant remember anything the next day, or who are constantly dropping F-bombs or who are dealing drugs. We're human, yes, but is that being an example for the lord? It says "but to those who are corrupted and do not believe, nothing is pure. In fact, both their minds and consciences are corrupted" Does that mean that anything they do before they believe in the lord is wrong? No matter what it is?

I want to urge everyone to take a deep look at their hearts...and examine your relationship the the lord (or if you even have one anymore).

Mr. President

So...I went to my sister-in-laws dance show today, and they danced to this song, and it really stuck out to me.

I will go

So....I've been listening to the new starfield CD non-stop for like..3 weeks, and its amazing, i highly recomend it! Anyways, I was thinking about moving to Vancouver, and the song "I will go" came on...and its almost like it was written for me. I've been wanting to help people in this way for 16 years! And yeah...so here are the lyrics.

To the desperate eyes and reaching hands
To the suffering and the lean
To the ones the world has cast aside
Where you want me I will be

I will go
I will go
I will go Lord send me
To the world
To the lost
To the poor and hungry
Take everything I am
Clay within your hands
I will go
I will go
Send me

Let me not be blind with privilege
Give me eyes to seek the pain
Let the blessing You've poured out on me
Not be spent on me in vain
Let this life be used for change

I wanna live for you
Go where you lead me
I wanna follow you

I wanna live for you
Go where you lead me
I wanna follow you

I wanna live for you
Go where you lead me
I wanna follow you



Send me! (4x)

Come Lord Jesus Come


Enough Said